Barbara Fish Counselling Services ... helping your life work

Here’s to You

Helping Your Life Work

Volume 10, Issue 1

January 2014

This being January, there is the usual barrage of articles and interviews about maintaining New Year’s resolutions, cleaning slates, starting over, and creating a ‘new you.’ I don’t recall reading an article or hearing an interview about how great the ‘old you’ is and that’s a pity. So I have decided to buck the trend and start a new one this year. Instead of focusing on all of the things we don’t like about ourselves and attempting to change them, how about we focus on all the things we like? What are we getting right?

We often take for granted those talents that come naturally to us, thinking that if we have the ability to do something, everybody else must have it too. But the reality is that not everybody shares our talents and it is a shame when we minimize or ignore them. Instead, let’s recognize and celebrate them in ourselves.

Let’s also think about what we achieved last year, not only with deadlines met, projects completed or money earned, but how we behaved as people. Even if we think we have done nothing special to speak of, let’s consider if someone else might think we have. For example, did we give our time and energy to those in need of it? Did we share our thoughts, ideas and wisdom with others who benefited from them? Did we treat others with respect and dignity even if they annoyed, aggravated and irritated us?

Let’s consider the impact on others in our lives when we complain about how fat we are, how unattractive, how stupid, etc. Let’s instead accept our flaws, failings and foibles. They are what make us human. They are also what help us grow and try and learn. Instead of trying to hide them, let’s share them with others, accentuate them and see what happens. Being vulnerable with others allows us to connect with them in strong and deep and personal ways and allows others to share their vulnerabilities with us.

We can always find aspects of ourselves to improve, but let’s not lose sight of all that we are that lets us shine in a sometimes-dark world and all that we do to make the world a better place. Let’s think about what it is that others love about us and if we don’t already recognize them, let’s learn to love these qualities in ourselves.

Here’s to you!

Barbara Fish, M.Ed.
Personal and Career Counsellor
“Helping Your Life Work”

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For more information, or to book an appointment at her Toronto office,
please contact Barbara by telephone at 416-498-1352 or by email at